How Deep Is Your Trust
The Transformative Power Of Giving Up
There was a time I used to walk through life thinking everything happened to me. What an exhausting existence it was to believe (really believe) that I was, in a sense, a victim of life.
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This was a time when I knew with certainty that my role this world was paired with struggle. More struggle, it seemed, then almost everyone around me who appeared to do everything (and receive everything) with ease.
I believed I had to work harder for less: less money, less love, less joy.
Accompanying that belief was a tremendous lack of trust—in all things, but especially myself. My lack of trust manifested in a gripping tight need for control. I set goals and worked hard to reach them, then beat myself up when I fell short. I exercised hard, then harder yet, if the last time wasn’t hard enough. I gave myself up completely to any relationship I was in, and lost myself further after it dissolved. I drank myself into oblivion to celebrate all my hard work, then let the crippling hangover punish me for my lack of self control.
It makes no sense at all, unless you’ve been there. In which case, it makes all the sense in the world.
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The first time I surrendered and threw my hands up to God, was the moment I realized my attempt to control had actually left me powerless. My need to grip tightly left me with the feeling that everything was slipping away.​..​
Alcohol Causes Cancer, But Does Anyone Really GAF?
Observations Of Drinking Culture in the Ageof Health Warnings We'd Rather Ignore
My husband and I went out to dinner on Saturday night. Since we are parents to a 14 month old who we had in tow, we went early—5:30 to be exact—and the intimate Japanese restaurant was packed with people just like us. Families. Just like us, but slightly different because we were the only table not drinking.
This might sound like an exaggeration, but I can assure you it’s not. I walked the loop of the dining room at least five times with my kid on my hip, pointing out the lanterns and exit signs to keep him entertained while we waited on our food. While doing so, I did a very sober-person thing, and took note of how many folks were drinking, what they were drinking and how much they were drinking (IYKYK). Which is why I can confirm that every table except ours was consuming alcohol.
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While we enjoy the restaurant’s small, delicious food menu, others apparently appreciate the robust bar menu, which is six pages compared to the food’s two. The focus of the restaurant is clearly on a little bit of food that pairs well with a whole lot of booze, but since we usually order take out, we missed the memo.
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One table behind us, with three small kids, was ordering as many drinks as they could as long as food was still coming to the table—as the kiddos ordered dessert, the parents threw on one more round of Sapporo, while they downed the remainder of their craft cocktail. I get it. It was 5:30pm. If they played their cards right, they could have three rounds of drinks and still call it a night by seven or be home by seven and pour one (maybe two) more after the kids are in bed by eight…
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But I digress.
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